Name: Whitney Dafoe
Missing Since: 2006
Location: Palo Alto, CA
Written by: Ashley Davis, Whitney’s Sister
“As a girl growing up, dreaming of your perfect wedding with your friends, you think flowers, and tulle, and candlelight.
As an adult all you try to do when planning that wedding is try to get it as close to that childhood dream as possible.
So when I got engaged, the first person I wanted to call was my best friend. The person that had dreamt up images with me of flowing grassy fields, hot pink shoes, and dancing down the aisle. When the realization hit me that I could not call him, I could not talk to him, I could not even tell him I was getting married, a sense of deep loss and heartbreak flooded over me.
My brother, Whitney Dafoe, has been sick with CFS for close to ten years, gradually getting worse day by day, hanging on to his life with the strongest sense of hope I have ever seen in a human being.
It took 6 months for Whitney to have a good enough day that my mom could write him a small note telling him I was engaged. He held the card to his heart and cried for hours. I knew the tears were of happiness that I had found my person, and of loss that he could not be there with me by my side.
What Whitney doesn’t know is that he is my person, my best friend, my other half. He is the person that I shared my hopes and dreams with, and every struggle along the way. He gave me the strength to keep powering through life even when it felt impossible.
So to not have Whitney there, with me, my fiance on one side, and him on the other, is an indescribable loss.
CFS has taken everything from me. It has taken my brother, my biggest role model, my best friend, the most magical human being I have ever met.
He will not be with me on my wedding day to see me in my flowing white dress, he will not hug me and cry for joy, he will not even know that it is my wedding day. In trying to find the joy of the occasion it is often difficult to not get lost in the heartbreak of his absence.”